A Dangerous Game

Hunting the Ouseburn Otter has become a dangerous game. In an effort to catch the little critter once and for all, I have been out and about putting up Wanted posters along the Ouseburn River and in a few pubs in the Ouseburn Valley. I have realised that getting this little guy on film is not a one man (or woman) mission. It requires hundreds of vigilant eyes (those are your eyes), mobile phones at the ready (those are your phones), poised to catch him unawares as he dodges yet another of the cameras (unfortunately mine). Well he can't dodge all of the cameras, all of the time, especially if they are disguised in something as innocuous as a mobile phone. Oh I think we might just be closing in.

Anyway, you may be asking yourself why this hunt has become such a dangerous game all of a sudden. Surely braving a golf course and some pretty bad golfers, not to mention getting wet feet, is danger enough? For some. Yes. For me. Of course not. Nature has taken the side of the otter. What I thought would be a seemingly pleasant walk along the Ouseburn this afternoon soon turned into a scene not dissimilar to a war film. Imagine bullets raining down on you but instead of bullets, think conkers. Solid, rock hard conkers. On my head. Yes, I did come back with my arms and legs intact and no shrapnel in sight but I could have done with a great big combat-style helmet to protect me from those conkers 'falling' (oh so innocently) with a vengeance. The hunt for the Ouseburn Otter can be tough indeed. Oh and to add insult to injury, my esteemed colleague Kevin O'Hara (otter spotter extraordinaire) actually SAW the Ouseburn Otter at the end of last week (no camera to hand - surprise surprise. This otter knows its stuff). I'm almost too scared to check the footage. I don't think I will be able to handle another wily otter dodge this month!

The otters in the pictures are the more well behaved cousins of the Ouseburn Otter, currently residing at Gosforth Park and Big Waters respectively. This is what you are looking for (only more sneaky and less accommodating)!

Where has all the otter action gone?

While there is no otter action going on, I thought I would amuse you all with some pictures of the smallest space under the smallest bridge in the world. Now I realise that the space doesn't look all that small but trust me, it is. And can you see the dark cavernous bit stretching up into the distance? Thats the bit I have to get under. This first action of crawling under is child's play. See my shiny white trainers I have on? Not anymore. Minutes after I grabbed hold of the camera, it decided to take a tumble - plinth and all. That meant I too had to tumble - straight into my old nemesis the dirty Ouseburn river (just to clarify, the Ouseburn is not dirty as far as rivers go, just as far as new trainers in rivers do). So now I have no otter pictures and dirty trainers but I did get footage of a fox (again). Exciting stuff really. I really do feel like I'm winning this battle as the Ouseburn Otter is running out of tricks. I feel like everything he can possibly to do outwit me, he's already done. Next week is the week. Just you wait Mr O.

A Bum Deal

This is no longer funny. Yes, I will admit that I believe the Ouseburn Otter is some sort of super-species with a more wiley mind than most and yes, I will admit that I believe much of what the otter has been doing has been in a specific attempt to wind me up. But for an otter to know how a camera works and how much of itself will be caught in the frame? Surely not. Surely this entire fiasco of otter cleverness and deception has been at least partly driven by the Ouseburn Otter's natural behaviour? I'm not so sure anymore. The Ouseburn Otter has certainly shown me, in no uncertain terms, just what he thinks of the WildPlaces project. Not a lot as it happens.

I honestly can't believe this little guy. Would it have been so hard to turn around and smile for the camera. Just once. Instead I get a wonderful shot of an otter bum and the little present he decided to leave behind. Did you see it steam?! Thanks Mr O. To make matters worse, in a fit of cleverness, I set up a camera on the opposite river bank, giving me a fantastic wide angle view - sure to catch any action going on on the mound. Not so. There is some serious otter sorcery going on under this bridge. The camera got some lovely recordings of rats (way smaller than an otter) but just happened to allow a big fat otter wander by undetected. An unlikey partnership between otter and camera has evolved.

Time to step up the game. Keep an eye out for Wanted posters along the Ouseburn River and pubs calling for the Ouseburn Otter's blood (not literally - but oh how I've thought about it!). He must be captured (on film). He must be shot (on camera). Help me out. Please.

Clever Otter

I should have known it would not be a good day when howling wind and lashes of rain greeted me on the golf course this morning. I was just so sure that the Ouseburn Otter would be captured on film, that I could finally put this mission to rest and find some other urban mammals to inconvenience with my cameras. How wrong was I? Pretty wrong. Pre-etty wrong. Things were looking good when I crawled into the tiny space under the bridge. For one, the camera was still there but (and this is exciting) there was also a mountain of fresh spraint - a sure sign that I'd got the little critter on film. So I rushed back to the Trust, chanting "GOTCHA!" all the while and looking like a right loony to the other drivers. This is all I got. Now I know I've never seen the Ouseburn Otter fully and clearly on film but I think it's safe to say that this aint him!

Yep, just the badger and the fox that I already knew was on there. And to top it all off, the time and date on the camera has a mind of its own - I promise that this isn't from 2008 (when I had absolutely no idea of the torment the Ouseburn Otter would cause). But my real mistake? A simple schoolboy error that Iwill be kicking myself for many weeks (well, lets be realistic - months, maybe years) to come - I let the batteries run out and the Ouseburn Otter ran in, undetected. Again. Clever, clever otter. Silly, silly me.